I Would (by James Leland Ludeau III from Lafayette,LA)

a warrior who sometimes seeks refuge
where do i turn when i feel weak?
weakened?
i turn toward you
the smile on my face
took years to hone
so much darkness i've seen
like clouds raining thunder above my head
ducking
weaving
running away from the madness
and at the same time avoiding any goodness
thinking i didn't deserve it
that was the past
i thought that i could prove myself with greed
but i held an empty sack that could never be filled
and the first time i knelt in prayer i felt something move up my spine
silence erased the voices
no longer afraid
you could thread a needle with a teardrop from my eye
nothing is what it seems
not gonna run from the sadness anymore
i'll embrace it
love it
until it becomes illuminated
light
shed
down on me
and if i could peel my flesh away to show you what beats beneath my chest i would