Words of Acadiana

like Beyonce i'm gonna get on my surfboard ride this year above the surface fierce as the waves crest and fall i'll be above it all focused i know what i want seize it own it rock it it's a lesson i've lived to learn what you get you earn full of naked tanned skin blond hair tattoos words i will create my own visual i will not be part of a picture that you paint of me I am ME my own creation life is short no matter how many years you get i want to live louder crank it up i want to stand out this year contribute inspire look into my eyes and feel my soul touch my skin and feel the heat i am gonna ride it with my surfboard

2014 no empty promises no short term goals resolutions are not solutions action not reaction solid survival striving growing moving showing this shit is about to get owned i've grown i've shown every part of myself but my soul is about to explode into a glittery show show and tell heaven not hell stars champagne hard work gym sweat blood tears i will emerge i was submerged i urge to explode purge break the mold sexy sex naked flesh on the floor heavy breathing bringing it back 2014....LOOK OUT

i want to stand over the toilet and shit out the turd of a year that 2013 was. I want to first express that i am thankful for everything that i have, and realize that a lot of people on this planet have gone through far, far worse than i did in 2013. But this year was a real low for me. But, let's address some positive things first. I met Louis Toliver and started writing again and got inspired to join the Louisiana Words crew. I even started this blog of my own. I ventured out of my comfort zone. i started going out again. I can thank Joel Bergeron for pushing me toward that. And even though we parted ways this year, i will always wish him well. I felt inspired to tattoo my body more this year. Stars and the word FORGIVE. which is huge. a big, big lesson for me. FORGIVE. let it all go. the hurt. the pain. the guilt. the past. FORGIVE and move on with you life. start new things. I took some spiritual steps forward after taking one HUGE step back...i thought that i needed Botox to l

i gave you all of me it wasn't enough but that says more about you  than it says about me now there's no need to call me on the phone i'd rather be alone my love no longer around hidden behind walls that won't come down you treated me like i'd never been so have some of your own medicine penicillin won't cure i'm the villain willing to tear it all down to remain free no longer you no longer me no longer we

you see this boy in front of you and i say boy because i believe i still am i'm growing learning changing i'm a slow bloomer but it's coming to life i felt wronged by my childhood i felt that life isn't fair i wore the victim hat but something shifted and i've met people who had fathers who abused them and i felt lucky i felt that not having my dad was in a way a gift it inspired me to write and paint and draw i looked for many ways to fill the hole in my life i don't feel like the others around me i feel different i'm oversensitive to things i wear my heart on my sleeve but you have to look past the exterior to see it but i feel it all crumbling i get a change weekly to stand in front of an audience and share my writings share my feelings i get to feel an exchange of energy a connection and i also get to hear what others have gone through and it makes me realize that we are all surviving this life and that happiness is not someth

i am attracted to The Fight it lives in me having no father helped create it i didn't feel protected so i fought to protect myself built an exterior that no one could destroy huge walls around my heart to block away any pain or hurt i disguised pain with humor distraction there was a huge contradiction between my dimply smile and my sad brown eyes but The Fight grew i wanted my voice to be heard so i wrote words freeing i no longer felt incarcerated by my own pain i remember nights lying in bed reading Anne Sexton and i connected to her oppression she committed suicide and i could sympathize but The Fight was born early in me and i was collecting role models to help me escape my sad childhood artists dancers writers they took me out of the environment i grew up in where something was constantly missing i never even missed him i didn't really know him i guess what i missed was the idea of him The Fight continued and when i felt more comfortable in

a thousand thoughts i think of you sometimes i worry that it's wasted time sometimes it's just enough sometimes it's too much but all i can do is wait wait to see what happens and feel feel feelings and it's been a while since i smiled like this been a while since i had such a connection so go on baby get the lighter we're gonna start our fire like silent soldiers marching into love roll over and whisper some sweetness in my ear come here and cuddle up

i watch you looking at me and my fever grows i'm a lucky man with fire in my hand i hope you understand happiness it's just a change in me something in my liberty oh my mind happiness it's just a change of my scenery there's a message in the mess that i once was just keep going that's what i think my voice says whether it's good or bad now i'm a lucky man

i look up and i see stars i look down and i see stars stars cover me guide me soothe me i came along and wrote a poem for you to show you how beautiful you are to me and how i want to turn this into something beautiful for you i want to shine i want to be your star i want to hang onto you like the night wrap my arms around your body and feel your warmth it can be us against the world you're special to me lift off my blindfold and let me see again the stars on you on me us it's a starry winter night and my heart is exploding like a super nova your mouth covers mine and i utter not a word you silence my wildness my hand reaches for yours and tonight don't let go don't let time erode us in the rain slow it down whatever moments whatever minutes i get of you i treasure i hang onto like stars hold onto the night sky you're my something

hard as a diamond soft as cashmere depends on the day and how you treat me it's all in your approach i'm a rough and tough nothing's gonna knock this boy down i'd rather laugh with you than fight i'd rather share with you than take but my soul is a storm and it only takes one ingredient to cause havoc you so watch how you talk to me you'd much rather have my head on your shoulder than up in your face and i'd rather be sweet than sour we are at a point where we are never going to be the same again we are always at that point so let's heal together instead of hurting let's not let the world unravel us

showered in grace fragranced by love grounded in purity humbled by honesty lived in my skin amazed by evolution

you're not angel baby as you pin me to the bed this love explodes fireworks bite marks claw marks primal yet sweet and there's a little of last night left on these sheets i'm no angel either there are no angels in love we've all been on our knees and not to pray we've all had that taste of love in our mouths it's why we chase it every chance we get so if i cook this meal for you naked will you taste the lust i pour into it? we have chemistry we have a recipe that works straight up fucking then love making sinner and saint your kisses fall on my lips i feel your breath i can smell you i hear your heartbeat beneath your chest feel the hair of our bodies rubbing and i'm not ashamed i'm not sorry no sorrows no regrets i was made for this

shine a light on it it's worth it and excuse while i claim the crown that's always been mine affix it on top of my head and i will stomp around this planet and live my life loudly proudly i'm a lion for fuck's sake i'm not build to cower i'm built to roar right in your face i'm built for the hunt i'm built for the mother fucking kill a thousand years a sheep doesn't beat one as a lion that energy returning king kingdom mine ours intertwined and won't you feel silly that you doubted me while i was down i was simply napping preparing for this next chapter i'm gonna own the fuck out of this moment

On a winter's night walking arm in arm the new stars on my arm ablaze with pain the cold fills my lungs i breathe it in ready to begin your head on my shoulder such sweetness comfort you took the pretty picture of who i thought i was and you smashed it into bits sank me into blackness and you sealed it with your kiss want you so don't want to let you go it's amazing what a boy can do i can not stop myself my heart aches from the piercing poison arrowed you aimed and stabbed it with it's heavy and it's bitter and it's tearing me apart tearing me away from who i was you have my heart it's amazing what a boy can say love you more than yesterday if only i could set you free you've worked your way inside of me and it's crazy how easily i gave up the struggle to remain stubborn want you and no one else

i look outside on this crisp winter morning and the leaves that are trying to hang on remind me that eventually it all falls away we shed the old to create new and the colors of this morning are blue and orange and red and my heart is full and my head is calm in this moment standing in my doorway in my underwear freezing waiting for you to arrive the sun is warm on my bare feet and i have everything i need i'm where i'm supposed to be let the whole world be at war fighting for what their egos want i'll retreat to my own little island of peace i'll go for my soul and my heart and let my ego dissolve into light i'm happy i have a visual a vision of an artist

i am figuring it out as i go the mountains they have called to me i have found myself in them i have carved a constellation of my own out on my arm captured by stars guided by light trying to battle my ego i don't want to just be a waste of your energy and i don't pretend to know what you know but if we already knew what everyone knows we wouldn't have anything to learn tonight and it makes it alright i say bring it on bring what you've got i'll take my shot i'll try to love you like you've never known i have had enough mystery let's create a history together

excuse my insecurities as they seep out as they dissolve i resolve to make it past them leave them behind me the way i was treated in my past has no bearing on my future what i feel is purity clarity i can't give you everything but i can give you what you thought you need give me a map of what you want and i'll get us there let's talk about the road behind us and how getting lost isn't a waste of time it's all for the sake of arriving with you i can't take back what's been done but i can make you promises of what i'll do we could make this into anything we could make it more than words we speak make us into what we should be it's just like it feels heals us from the inside out it's what we're about lay your head head upon my lap and let me tell you about it and in the moment my insecurities die

i'm a sinner and i own it i'm covered in ink i covet the skin that covers your body i want to dive into it i'm guilty of lust of dirty thoughts sex against the wall and if there's a mirror i'll catch a glimpse just to make sure i look good in the lighting i'm a sinner i like everything in excess i want to live out loud i drink my wine down and i think about how great it is to kiss you my thoughts are caught in the clouds above we're slowly writing a story word by word touch by touch something is happening beneath my skin i'm a sinner not a beginner and i don't even believe in sin i just give in it is what it is you take what you take and you leave what you leave it's an exchange an energy flow

he's my different kind of buzz with his head on my lap asleep he settles in and his breathing changes and we both have stars on our arms it's sexy

i can picture you sitting in your chair staring out of the window looking at the city below you your face serene and i wonder if you wonder about me why must we wake up in beds in different cities when we love each other two egos fighting to win but both losing and time waits for no man i try to give in but it's not my nature but the wanting for you is stronger than my resolve and i call you and i act like it's all cool can you see through my facade? this love is a masterpiece i keep your shirt in a drawer because it reminds me of that first week and it smells like innocence we may never give in to this love enough to make it work but i want you to know that it's significant it's changed me

woke up in your bed confused used the wine from last night erased my judgment sins within grinning being in love with you is like driving a Maserati down a dead in street spinning wheels but there is a gravity between us that grounds me you say more with your hands quicksand i fall and it's my choice the friction of you against me i crave wreckless i like it

you're my achilles heel my weak spot your smile erases my fury the way you touch me makes me forget that anything else exists i don't know if that is good or bad or both love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right worth the fight so i'll go with it

he wrote a novel on my skin his touch so full of intention a story unfolds unfolding holding hands in the dark lighting sparks lightning in this bed striking sizzling electrical storm lighting our way fluid the flow consumed renewed and if i wrote a note it's be a symphony so sweet and my skin can still feel the touch the energy left behind the words telling our story only seen by me

you left your hat for me like a safety blanket it smells like you i feel you in it your energy amazing i realize that me and my heart shouldn't feel so far apart and it brings me down to earth that hat i held in my hand as i slept and i told it some secrets i've never shared a hat and a night and a boy full of magic full of stars

it's the simple things right now it's that smile that diamond in his ear it's the blue of his eyes it's the way he laughs it's the way he looks back at me each moment pregnant with happiness it's simple easy and it feels good like a flow like floating like i'm a balloon rising higher and higher and not of my own accord it feels like something i could just feel just go with be happy be present trust hope simple things this week that sums it up for me

i have an angel and he needs no wings to make me fly and we see those stars together whenever we're together gives me kisses just for coming home and gives me presents with his presence i'm just a fortunate fool and it feels so cool

in my bed stars diamonds shine hairy chests heavy breath open mouth kisses my skin feeling your touch we become one for moments lost in your eyes so blue dilated pupils from the feelings in this bed clasped hands sweet struggles sweat we are so close that the only thing between us is hairs my mind blown smiles

i have always felt like the stars were my home so i carved a constellation of my own into my skin my arms my neck a reminder of the heavenly place i longed to dwell but then i met you and you have stars on your arms and i feel like home there seeing stars sharing stars skin touch ink reminders of what we long for the light in your eyes lets me know i'm not alone stars distant near

I want the faith of Moses i wish for his strength i may not have 600,000 Israelites behind me waiting for salvation but i have a Red Sea of my own to part God called on Moses He calls on each of us but sometimes we fail to hear Him because our chaos is louder than His whisper we all have a mountain to climb seas to part we all need to be saved we need a clearer path we all have an Egypt we need to get away from so when i close my eyes and i feel out of control i pray to be more like Moses i want to lead not follow i want to have faith that the obstacles in front of me are not brick walls, but clouds and i will push through

connections connective tissue issues arouse solve them connect reamin intact skin tears bones break souls remain the outside gives into time the soul lives on focus on the inside let the outside be a reflection on what's happening inside your beauty will never fade connect with me touch me feel me leave your clothes on the floor and press your body against mine feel my heartbeat beneath my skin feel as i give in stare into my eyes and see the mysteries that lie within remain by my side and i'll reveal them slowly one by one until the only thing between us is connection

I am not a boy I'm a storm with skin what lies within? hail and wind fire lightning the fury of a tempest

surrendering to how i feel it's real i feel so small in a world so big my whispers sometimes louder than my screams and when it's thundering rain it fades away the pieces of myself falling away until all that's left is my core the shell eroded the baggage i carried became too heavy for me to continue with so i left it where it belonged buried in my past and when i close my eyes i feel that i'll be alright to His words i hold on tight i struggled and i fought until i didn't and it got easier my insecurities are lessening lessons lay before me no longer living my life by what you expect respect for myself for my faith belief in the journey and i dance more freely through it all now opinions fall before they damage me took a long time to reach this point no more wasteful living i'm giving it all up elimination clearing my mind cleansing my body renewing my spirit

alone in a crowd a stranger i don't belong i gaze up at the stars and they feel like home wrap myself in them to remind me that where i am is just temporary travel through this life like a shooting star not sure where i belong so i just keep moving on and on and on and on the points of light in the sky guide me a black night blankets the earth around me but the stars provide hope they twinkle through the vast black sky and as i move through the crowds i feel like i'm moving through thick liquid time drags until i am outside again fixed on the night stars shining down brightly maybe my home is with them astral bodies i've written my own constellation on my body my astral body covered with stars until i can be with them

yeah i can wait for you i adore you and i believe in faith it lights my way you don't know how you saved me what you gave me i feel the light i have flown away i have come alive i am blown away wrapped in the truth i can live my life when i found you i lost the game and it all fell away and to this day when you rest your head on my shoulder i feel the love when i look into your brown eyes i drown it's deeper than anything i've ever felt tingles my spine that you're finally mine all my life i've waited for you now i adore you my prayers answered i eliminated enough exterior that my interior shone brightly enough to attract you you guide me you hide me from a world that is often cruel i see it all with different eyes than i did before when you are next to me a calm settles in and soothes my restless soul and it's enough for me finally enough was never enough before but i feel at home in my skin i have found myself living my li

in the beginning it was about resistance i'd only give so much but you blasted through my walls your love shone light into the darkest corner of my psyche you pushed me to believe you coerced me into sharing my talents you embraced my wildness you dealt with my insanity you tamed the beast and had me eating out of your hand in time global transformation begins with changing yourself it's really not so hard once you're ready you just let go of who you were and you embrace who you should be

you were so mad at me for what you'd done you blamed me it was your vicious cycle i was just anyone in the picture you'd repeated the process many times over i'd diminished who i was i had swallowed my light in order to be with you and you didn't appreciate what you had you ate grass from the pasture next door thinking it would bring you pleasure you didn't treasure what we had and i blamed you as much as you blamed me but in the end i didn't love you you were a stepping stone for me i needed change you provided it i took advantage felt that i owed more than i did so i gave up my soul for us to feel whole and it still didn't work drug my dick through the dirt we tried to destroy each other to no avail cancer took you away in the end and i hope that you dwell in the house of the Lord now and that when i say i forgive you you hear it when you know better you do better i'm trying i may have never really loved you because i

kill them with kindness turn the other cheek without being meek forgive give live my ego battles with my light every day sometimes i go astray revenge isn't mine to have it's the Lord's i'm learning to roll with punches dust myself off and stand tall again bring it bring what you've got i'll face it erase it it won't destroy me employ me to forgive you to accept that what you've done was a favor in the end can we still be friends? sometimes yes other times no some people just have to go but this person i am is growing and learning and yearning to be a bigger badder ass version of who i used to be i'll always be a rock star pulling on my cock star giving the middle finger to the system ego driven but risen from where i was i let go what you did to me i brought onto myself no longer hate you but won't date you ever again i've evolved past it no longer slave to your shit

i feel my fierceness returning i feel it in my muscles in my bones in the fiber of my being "don't fuck with King" that's my motto for the next few months i'm transforming again changing because i was changed this toxin is almost out of my body and i'll respect my body more this time around listen to it cater to it own it I was created to perfectly be James and i'll honor that mind body spirit RENEWED

your energy for me is like pink light it soothes me it erases harshness you bring out a side of me that perhaps i've been afraid to show until now we create we collaborate i lean on you you lean on me our friendship i treasure i see beneath the exterior and find the interior even more alluring i see a soul with such good intentions and it's amazing to witness your evolution your revolution the time that i spend with you nourishes my soul quiets my ego i am grateful that God chose to introduce us i can't wait to see what the future holds thank you for not just listening to me but for hearing me your energy inspires me to new heights

Colorado the Western sky it calls me into it to float above the earth and see more clearly he comes to me in my dreams and tells me what i need to know guides me to the Light i'm supposed to know inspired by the awe that i feel gotta make my way through the night hanging on with all of my might when i'm lost and can't find my way i feel the pieces falling away the sky around me explodes into pinks and oranges the stars illuminate my way and it feels like i just got home it twists my body into movements i didn't know i had ignites my bones fills me with life as i dance across this sky i leave trails of stars behind me i want to fall into His arms tonight the feeling that it'll be alright i surrender it's a long way home and for the first time i don't feel so alone

Your kindness shows in your smile your knowledge spills out of your eyes a beauty true pure your soul and mine connect we are on the same level our lives parallel we walk tall we are strong we have walked through the fire together like soldiers marching on when i feel scared, you calm me when i am excited, you boost the emotion when i laugh, you laugh with me when i cry, you wipe my face we belong you are one of my soulmates

the stars above feel like home as they sparkle in this crisp Colorado night tiny pins of light in a blanket of cobalt and black sky promises that darkness never wins like diamonds reflecting the light they contain precious and i look up in awe and i blow my wishes into the wind hanging on stars counting them watching their twinkle my soul is full of stars my arms my neck stars etched into my skin promises reminded that the darkness that once threatened me didn't win

Like an Indian I want to paint myself in red clay and strip away the clothes that hide the beauty of what God created i want to dance until my body aches i want to adorn my head with feathers so my soul can fly i want to extend my arms wrap them around the mountains i want to stomp stomp out all the negative forces that pull at us i want to hear God's voice whisper to me in the winds as the whip around the mountain i want to touch the rocks and feel their power i want to drink of the natural springs and heal my body i want to be one with the earth i want an Indian name He Who Seeks it speaks to me i want to feel the sun on my face as a i gaze up at the majesty of the mountain i want to bathe in the creeks i want to be wild and free and i want to show my gratitude for this life for the earth around me i want to breathe in the mountain air and let it take away my pain as i exhale i want to feel my spirit connect with yours i want to see like an Eagle with

Pike's Peak looms snowcapped silent mighty been here long before me will remain long after me its power sits there in its greatness vast its power so great that my attempt to climb higher that he wants results in vertigo and a nosebleed even the sun ducks behind him he shadows the land before him stealing the warmth of the sun leaving cold fierce winds that chill to the bone reminding you who is in charge it's humbling beautiful raw ancient the mountain and i we have a bond both unconquerable both born of God's will and God's presence is tangible in the rocks here Like He pushed the earth with his fingers and these ridges resulted put here to remind us that He is ever present and the energy of the Indians remains their knowledge their appreciation of the mountain their respect for the earth their gratitude there is power in the granite and the quartz the Indians knew this and as i look up i can feel the history weighing on me and i

we are all like boulders clinging to side of a mountain exposed to the elements hoping to not be rolled down out of control into a resting place below praying that the ground doesn't give way beneath us sending us tumbling crumbling we are all part of the mountain little pieces of its evolution proof that it had a past life elemental mineral makeup time has formed each of us unique there is a peace in knowing that even if we slide off the mountain and come to rest in the valley that we are still connected to it that we can stand on our own if there is God in these mountains then we are all part of Him the sum of us making the whole awe inspiring mountain peaks up high valleys below tremendous glory

Your hate lit a match beneath me the winds fed the fury the winds of change exchange love from hate the wild fire of my soul blazed everything in its path charred scarred and you prayed for a thunderstorm to extinguish my wrath but my destiny was to consume you and underneath the ruins you're alive so you'll survive that match you threw grew into an energy no one could contain caused a pain but wounds heal they don't steal all the light from the future they just remind you of what once was and they open a pathway for regrowth