The Man Who Gave In (by James Leland Ludeau III from Lafayette,LA)

you were so mad at me
for what you'd done
you blamed me
it was your vicious cycle
i was just anyone in the picture
you'd repeated the process many times over
i'd diminished who i was
i had swallowed my light
in order to be with you
and you didn't appreciate what you had
you ate grass from the pasture next door
thinking it would bring you pleasure
you didn't treasure
what we had
and i blamed you as much as you blamed me
but in the end i didn't love you
you were a stepping stone for me
i needed change
you provided it
i took advantage
felt that i owed more than i did
so i gave up my soul
for us to feel whole
and it still didn't work
drug my dick through the dirt
we tried to destroy each other
to no avail
cancer took you away in the end
and i hope that you dwell in the house of the Lord now
and that when i say i forgive you
you hear it
when you know better you do better
i'm trying
i may have never really loved you
because i didn't understand what love without condition felt like
but i did try
you violently pushed me away
you broke my bones
you threw me into the rocks
discarded me
yet regarded me
as someone you'd love til you dying last breath
and death
has now overtaken you
i haven't forsaken you
i wish you well
i wish you light
and each day i fight with all of my might
not to be that man again
who gave in