My Poems About Love (by James Leland Ludeau III from Lafayette,LA)

"you write a lot of poems about love" he said
"I'd like to know your backstory" he continued.....
....well.....let me tell you a little about me
and you can understand my psyche
i was born a Leo
so i'm narcissistic by nature
a curse and a blessing
i put up a good front
i disguise my insecurities with laughter and a seemingly confident exterior
but inside i'm as fucked as anyone
maybe more
i grew up without knowing my father
and it haunted me
it was a mystery i couldn't solve
the missing half of me
it led me to seek out
to act out
i tried on so many faces
i tried to be anyone and anything to fit in
wanted to be what they wanted me to be
so my poems about love
are about as much about external love as internal love
i have racked up a list of lovers that would rival anyone's
but i recently learned to love me
to accept my flaws
to show them
with pride
i've earned them
i was trying to fix something that i couldn't fix
no longer
being honest
with me
with you
with us
i'm going along this life one step at a time
just like you
trying to figure it out
before my time expires
so, not all my poems are about loving someone else
some of them deal with self love
and learning to love life
and some of them are about my relationship with God