Words of Acadiana

Our love brought me to heaven then you watched me fall fell out of love such a long way down was down on my knees alone in the dark through darkness and despair almost felt beyond repair a symphony of feelings set my heart back into motion hurt, strength devotion, humility love, trust desire, joy i found what i needed to get me through a dark night of my soul a journey literally through hell now i'm born again figured out only faith would lift me back up now i am back on my feet dancing to the beat that grows from inside my soul forgiven and forgotten i walk alone in peace faith calling me home lifting me up love basked in the midnight of my imagination never imagined i could love and accept myself at one point i was so lost in being what i thought you needed me to be i've embraced my flaws healed my scars i can now be my own fire when all the lights go out

Messiah or Pariah save me? entomb me? your spell cast can it last breathe a new breath into my lungs will i wake up anew? i won't get to the end of my days saying i wasn't amazed crazed by my love for you the flame flickers will you wake up to find that you love me too? is the best we can do? tattered and torn we led wicked lives until we found each other you, the day i, the night a fight with all of our might to grow like a vine covering a fence sometimes squeezing the air out of the room around us we do this dance in the dark with your words you cut me down the middle you fuck me up a little but you come back with arms open hoping that i'll lay back in them and in my mind i already have so what if my body just follows suit? you can win the fight i'll take the war i'll wear the scar this living for love heaven above hell below what's left to show? when you give your all and you free fall into the abyss unable to resis

love you in a way that weighs me down at times takes me down a path not of self discovery but self loss lost sight of who i was i bled into you we become one and my soul suffered i don't wanna talk about it but i have to  just hold me while i cry my eyes out promised to protect me if i showed you my weakness but what i need protecting from most is you you're my poison breathing my last breath barefooted across my own grave and i've always had a fascination with destruction breaking down what does that say about me? if i closed my eyes, would you catch me now? can we recover from this? or do we die a beautiful death? is this the end? because i am the kinda guy who does greatly with ends i love beginning again so lift me up or tear me down but know in my head i wear the crown King of my own castle a warrior of love a soldier for respect you can fight with me or fight me you choose i can dance around like a ballerina or i can fight like a n

i think somewhere along the way the devil had to pray not to keep my soul he played the role of savior my behavior certainly deserved of being cast into hell but he cast a spell knowing damn well that i belonged with the angels in the ether the unknown was meant to be my home the stars in the sky the answers to why it all appears in my head sometimes black sometimes red don't know why but i'm attracted to the dark knowing i'm a spark that could set this whole world ablaze living my days like each one could be my last seeing past what others judge me for sometimes stumbled tumbled but i dust myself off and adjust my crown back on my head my story's not written not over there's something to say when you make the devil pray got something special within my soul could i escape all harm if i just laid here in your arms could i cast a spell that you can't undo could i make you love me too teach me how to pray i'm on my knees tha

your mouth opens words pour out serpents fall out aural sex burning my ears your words drip down my body like honey sweetening me sticky sweet and seductively addictive i'm bound desire hangs in the air like smoke and i am sucking it all into my lungs i exhale you i inhale us our fingers laced together this is how it all begins this love quiet like a fire consuming all in its path no warning combustion sparking up my heart are you the devil? or are you an angel? aren't they one in the same? either way i'm willing this highwire i walk dangling trying to balance myself certain death or incredible pleasure being my fate i find myself wanting to take risks again so my words like a fog wrap around the mountain of your being wishing to seduce hoping to capture falling gently on your warm skin like snowflakes 'tis the season wanna melt?

i tried to shock you i tried to be the standout never wanted to follow the crowd but deep down in my rebel heart i knew better your opinion wold never from me not crumble me i'd be who i am afraid or not and every relationship i had was balanced on what i'd gain or lose trying to right my wrongs but still don't belong i'm an outcast built to last not fit in not set up to win but to survive to thrive half black not quite white that's where i feel right deep down in my rebel heart tearing apart who i was and who you thought i should be i'm free take these shackles off my feet so i can dance put you in a trance my realness surfaces not what you expected half rejected rejected but i still have my voice and my words and i'll be true to me

a warrior who sometimes seeks refuge where do i turn when i feel weak? weakened? i turn toward you the smile on my face took years to hone so much darkness i've seen like clouds raining thunder above my head ducking weaving running away from the madness and at the same time avoiding any goodness thinking i didn't deserve it that was the past i thought that i could prove myself with greed but i held an empty sack that could never be filled and the first time i knelt in prayer i felt something move up my spine silence erased the voices no longer afraid you could thread a needle with a teardrop from my eye nothing is what it seems not gonna run from the sadness anymore i'll embrace it love it until it becomes illuminated light shed down on me and if i could peel my flesh away to show you what beats beneath my chest i would

when i talk to you i am revived when i see you i am uplifted your tattooed skin speaks my language soulmates we've been through the fire together honed by our circumstances unspeakable bond when i close my eyes i can feel you if that isn't real....i don't know what is we go together like the sand and the sea

there were times that i was into myself more than i was into you times that i gave up myself to be with you completely lost myself i put up fronts lied played roles that i wasn't really comfortable with but i'm human and i've never stopped trying for love i've taken the dive into the deep end never afraid to swim through the tempest gone from zero to sixty instantly but i've been on a search and i'm just a guy looking for love never meant  to hurt anyone on my quest i have faults scars flaws that i'm no longer afraid to expose dont' wanna hide behind a facade that we are trained to use no distractions i am me you love me or you don't you can deal or you can't i've shared so much for so long been so right been so wrong heart on my sleeve slept with thieves who stole part who broke my heart but i'm still not afraid to restart and i'll dance to my own beat not beat up not down let's go another round

"planes" he said "can carry you away to sexy weekends" and that's all it took bags packed ticket booked i was off into the sky my wings "i know places we won't be found" he said as i touched down and he took away from it all he had the kind of blue eyes like the sea like oceans you want to drown in so you jump right in knowing it may kill you or save you that's the beauty you never know and my heart is not bulletproof he proved that like cupid he shot his arrow at me he was all over me against the wall on the floor in the shower "well" i thought "this is what a sexy weekend is" i'd never known such intense passion "you know i dove into your eyes" i confessed "well your dimples will save you" he answered and as i boarded my flight home i had 2 thoughts that i could not wait until my next sexy weekend getaway and i had faith that good guys still exist

my tears i cried an ocean full of pain salty i could float in them never gasping for breath oceans of tears oceans of love silently falling on me like rain i tried to change to rearrange what you didn't think worked meet me again when blue skies have erased all the rain meet me again when there's less pain these oceans of love pulling me under thunder calling to my heart i thought it should hurt i thought we should suffer Shakespearean but alas it doesn't and when it works it just works no loss no gain and there comes a time you love without pain

i'm standing on a mountain and i'm screaming your name i'm trying to tell you that love is just a game and i'm ready to play again all i really need to express is that i'm destroyed when you leave i grieve even if it's for an hour it pains my heart it cuts me in two like a magician you make half of me disappear absolve and a night full of stars reminds me to stop looking at the ground and gaze up at the sky leave a light on there's a crack a crack in everything that's where the light seeps in i'm broken wounded hurt insecure and it's your care that mends me that gentle touch of yours in the dark smooth skin against skin the blessing reveals itself i believe that the universe gives back to me and this night full of stars like holes to heaven proves my faith

a flock of birds hovering above and how could you cage something that knows how to fly? a flock of birds that's how i see this love the alchemy that exists between us it arrives next thing you know it's gone fly on and i wish you well whether we work out or not in the dark you're like the wind i feel you but i can not see you just a presence on my skin a magic a layer in the world i just can't describe spread your wings and fly over me and it may break my heart or it may set me apart but this love i feel will set me free in some way whatever comes to me i welcome it i embrace your embrace and if it lasts it does and if it doesn't it doesn't but in my head i'll never forget how it felt i'm open vulnerable pure true my heart is a flock of birds and for now i've landed on you

had been down the road struggled and fought used and abused mistreated proverbial road kill but something in you awakened something in me and you made me feel at least Half A Virgin i could see myself in Venice in a gondola singing to you a lion's breath down my neck down my thighs we are taught it's wrong to feel so right feels so good inside oooh baby yeah can't you hear my heartbeat? for the very first time you've touched something in me than no one has ever touched before a depth that gives pleasure backseats fogging up the windows i entered this half innocent but i'm afraid i've fallen down the rabbit hole and i'd crawl across the floor to get to you the bite on my lip lingers

draped in my cape pulled on my tights ready to fight thought i was your Superman but i was a clown in your circus of shit a storm blew into town that i could not fight i'd never win the man of steel no longer and the humanity sunk in deep within my skin weak i crumbled when you walked away my heart stopped i gasped for air spiraling out of control i sank no soaring and at that point i realized something much weaker than Kryptonite could take me down you you did it to me you knocked the Super out of this Man and i'm happy for it for i don't have to be a hero i just have to be a man there's a freedom in losing that puts the wind back in your sails

United not divided as States form a union so do people we stand as one undefeated many voices one common message LOVE we all deserve it United we stand or divided we fall don't we want what's just for us all? just justice just us everyone built this melting pot to blend that was the beauty of this nation that we had the dream and we made it happen United you and i in this to win this it's just some paper but it's what makes us equal it's not political it's human rights the right to love to the right to be together beyond state lines beyond politics fundamental these are the UNITED STATES are they not???? let's bring them back to focus

i knew that i was falling and there was nothing i could do to stop it as i was building my arms up i let my guard down and you crept in like the early morning light and you changed how i see things you changed how i feel about love and that character that i spent so long perfecting is but a memory i'm not really so strong around you i feel very weak i can not resist the way i feel when you are next to me and the sword and shield fall away and the battle is no longer on the field but it's in my DNA the fight this feeling like my skin is being ripped away and i'm exposed to the bone all that i've concealed is leaking freely now hemorrhaged i lay there and i'm reborn a new man a softer version of who i thought i needed to be and it's palpable this love that i feel for you it dictates my actions you're my moon i'm your ocean and you create waves in me for once i don't feel capsized i feel righted by what i feel for you a

naked on the floor exposed raw flawed i got it all wrong and i remember your kisses and they tasted like almonds, sea salt and chocolate they lingered bitter and sweet tangy and where i fucked up was that i could not recognize my hatred for myself so i was unable to love you like you needed my intentions full of pride i had to mask my strength to attract you and then distract you to show you my sweetness i possess both and these words they are tattooed on my heart this pain hurts like fucking hell i miss you you are the only one i've ever really loved and now that i love myself and i've accepted my flaws i've embraced my imperfection i see how perfect we could have been and i carry that with me heavy weighted down by a love that could not survive

as the sunlight dances across my face it occurs me to me that i'd love to know what it feels like for a girl in this world to know that you're smarter than what's penetrating you but to have to dumb yourself down for the pleasure or the security knowing that you have this strength that you have to hide how does that feel? you have this thing that makes men weak but you can't be strong or you'll scare them away that struggle the game of pretending to be one thing when you really are the opposite if i were a girl i'd make you earn the rights to ride it like the Wild West you'd have to prove your worth i can see my outfit denim and rhinestones i'd attract you into the backseat and then bite your head off like a black widow spider see, i can't hide my strength even though sometimes i feel weak

unapologetic that's how if feel for falling prey to your scent intoxicating it lured me in that day that we spent in Santa Fe exploring each other i belong to the West bathed in that golden light baptized by this newfound feeling

"I'm Carlos" my whole world came pouring down bowed my head as i lost the war he stalked me like prey but i'm a Leo pinned against the shower wall i felt the humidity of our lust and he stung my lips with his kisses strength and vulnerability a battle can i be strong enough to be respected? yet weak enough to give in? this feels like fireworks my fingertips light up when i touch his skin there's a beauty to him a purity like a cobalt blue sky feels like we are both moving through thick liquid slow motion it's a dance our movements his eyebrows so dark and thick like i can see them even in the dark this spark i'm so on fire he's a wet dream dressed like a day dream and i'm lackadaisical he looks like my next mistake and i'm ok with that

our skin piled on top of each other chocolate and alabaster zebra my inhibitions gone away i'm a sex machine wind me up and watch what i can do the world tries to constrain me refrain me from what i can be fuck 'em  is my new motto i feel like i've won the lotto with this one the sun seems dim next to him he lights me up corrupt erupt so this is what sex feels like when you break through your race  face to face lust envelopes this place sex lingers in the air i care what he feels what he craves i watched 12 Years A Slave and i know i'd have no part in keeping us apart mirror mirror on the wall who's the baddest of them all us he and i i'll try as hard as i can to keep him around i've found the one who almost got away

it's time to unite to fight for the right to love who we love shove what they think in the corner somewhere away from care as we lay in this bed our skin intertwined i realize we look like a zebra your smooth chocolate skin against my alabaster skin how could this be wrong? how could it be seen as so? we've put men on the moon an American lives on every continent on this planet how can we can we not be tolerant? our words don't have to divide they don't have to hide the love inside of us that will grow if we show that words like lights  in the night glow ignite our right to love one another without boundaries across the seas let's hold hands and unite it's our right one world one love one word whoever you believe created you it's all the same we are supposed to treat each other the way we want to be treated not defeated my voice rises through disguises it's all about love above me you blend in with me be that someo

i lay spilled across this cold floor please don't say you're sorry i'm in full control of myself and beneath closed doors and curtained off windows i live partaking of cigarettes in my fishnets the drag drags through my nose and ignites my lungs is this what it feels like for a girl? in this world? in your world? do i have to hide it? the weakness i feel when you see me like this yet the strength it gives me find what you love and let it kill you they say i've found it and i stand in front of the mirror and admire my thighs i find it funny that you wouldn't is it the cigarettes? or the fishnets? what scares you baby? never seen a dick in stockings before? do you wanna explore? is that what you're so afraid of? that you'd throw words and stones at me in public i have a dick between my legs but my mind is full of pussy and it sets off something in you like a revolver it shoots holes in your brain gender bending sinning just t

i see ghosts in all that we do i've grown so used to you it's haunting this feeling in my head this touch on my skin sin beneath love we fall prey victims to a love we share i fight so hard to still be me you laugh Magnificent that's how it feels on our first go 'round you broke my heart but i learned that only love can break your heart only you can crack this foolishness and leave my heart black and blue Only love can leave such a mark and i'm full of scars

lay your little heart in my hands i'll glue it's shattered bits back together and piece a love together no one's ever died from tears dry your eyes i'm here to hold the pain away and in your eyes a flame glows you set my whole world on fire with one look tears on your pillows just might teach you how to love again i know the hurt i know the way it crushes how it evaporates how it seizes your breath feels like it will never diminish he chose cocaine over me i understand he lost me and i was so lost for a while but those tears built strength and i stand before you a man more capable to love with a capacity that is not able to be measured no one has ever died from love so let me put you back together let me breathe new life into your heart be my treasure make it worth the wait

my tongue found that spot on your lower back i felt the electricity the moment we made contact there's nothing delicate about the way we love you pull on me i push you explosive we light up the dark like sparks this fire burns inside i live my life to watch your lips as your sleep so sweet and plump and pink and in my mind i'm always biting on your bottom lip and pulling pain beauty desire i watch as you wrap your hands in tape and your movements as your box like a dance and i am mesmerized as the sweat falls down the small of your back leaving your waistband damp you leave me with a smile on my face and dirty thoughts in my head prowess resistance yeah, this love is like a battle but one where you win even if you lose i feel the humidity of your breath on my neck and suddenly nothing else compare what else is there?

i kissed Judas in the garden fell into his gorgeous trap betrayed slayed he left me bleeding and alone on the brink of death gasping for air i think i died a spiritual death that night in the Garden of Gethsemane the crown of thorns dug deeply i sacrificed who i was to love him and i knew that his grasp was cold i knew it would kill me in the end but i sought the danger i lay on the ground licking my wounds if anyone would resurrect me it would be me my resurrection better than any erection i slowly came back to life been lied to and beat down i had nothing left to lose but my faith and it never faltered i could be strong again without him scars would be my story my glory that i rose when it was assumed i was dead and forgotten i was hung but not on a cross and when i licked my wounds could you taste it? did you enjoy it? watching me flogged metaphorically? whipped until i couldn't stand what part of you got pleasure in my pain?

i'm not myself when you're around not myself at all not sure of where i'm supposed to be searched so long for you placed all my bets on you couldn't lose wanted so much to be loved by you wished i could find someone as beautiful as you but in the process i forgot that i was special too idolized you made you more than a man talent and beauty and intelligence i was sold the whole package but unaware that i was the whole package myself i conformed when you didn't even ask didn't realize that love doesn't divide brought my baggage along for the ride not sure of who i was only that i wanted to be someone you wanted insecure i had to give that all up i had to equal up you taught me how to love love you and love myself realized along the way that it's the only way to be flaws and all masculine and feminine at the same time smart and sexy confident and kind there is room to be all love is freeing it's a freedom until it becom

it's part of the game risking shame to get to where you want to be you'll see times that you sail and times when you fail you take each as the come the sum of these experiences create your life love and strife you succeed and wear your crown then fall down then like Humpty Dumpty you're back again riding in the saddle enjoying your win what they think of you doesn't matter at all for you rise and you fall so is the ebb and flow of a life worth living giving taking mistaking forsaking it all happens as it should all good no bad to be had like a horse in its stable i'm able to rest up for the next ride the tide rolls in, rolls out whispers and shouts to succeed you must fail hated then haled exhaled flow out, flow in fail, win how high are the stakes? for heavens sakes for the rise we risk it all and dust off if we fall for the strong, you see, we never fail we just chase our holy grail our moment in the sun after it's wo

she melts the street beneath her feet the look in her eye hot as July her hair flowing free the only way to be she's a beauty her duty to make you laugh til you cry she ain't shy she'll show her ass as fast as her feelings her dealings have more to to with the mind she's kind she'll unwind and let it all go to show you how simple it should be free her spirit her soul she's not under your control she's often my refuge, the place i run she keeps me dancing til dawn chasing fun

while you attempt to define me i'll refine me you can't confine me i'll break free i'll be the me i want to be you'll see i have strong wings to carry me away from the shit you throw my way i duck and roll slip out of your control i'm an independent mother fucking soul with my prayer beads in hand and incense in the air i breathe away the things you care deep breath in deep breath out i'm not about to let you steal my peace i'll release those thoughts you think i should think shrink back into my Buddha stance no chance of reforming me no conforming me it's just not in my blood i've got a rebel heart and free ass soul never gonna do what i'm told won't be sold a story that isn't mine my shrine my own spot where i make it all disappear sheer bliss joy and harmony swarming me lighting my way through the dark

i find myself in your bed again like a spiderweb caught as your sink your fangs in and that old poison travels through my circulatory system again paralyzing me and you put on this display you blow back  into my life and you spin your web knowing and it's futile for me to resist and secretly i smile i love this feeling i enjoy the dance the capture you've always had a strange way of saying "I Love You"

the leaves fall in a display of orange and gold and red the air is crisp this longing in my heart grows as i head to meet you for coffee this love that just won't give up the ghost like 4th of July in my heart explosions 5 minutes with you and suddenly i am 23 again you touch my leg and those old feelings are alive again sparks shoot down my spine the love of my life no doubt about it i'm sure and as we leave the coffee shop i witness it beginning again

flashbacks and echoes i still see it all in my head letting go in pieces but never completely lips i'll never forget summer nights that caught my soul on fire consumed by you before i had a choice to backout i was already in the freefall and i'm still falling still loving you even though it's officially over those brown eyes looking into them so deep like a tempest of emotions and the way the morning light changed them to hazel i was young and dumb and i had no idea what i had no clue of the men we'd grow into lust complicated love but the love lingers on me like fog around a mountain unclear hard to navigate should i call? should i pick up the phone and tell you how i feel? or should i feed my soul with the memories we created? i sit in a chair looking out at the rain falling on the city beneath me and i wonder what you're thinking right now and wonder if sometimes you miss me a text comes and that old dimply smile emerges i simply

i see God in the rocks i feel his presence in the layers in the vastness the enormity of the mountains i feel inspired i feel when i touch the surface of the rocks that i communicate with them that i have mountains in my veins i understand the language of the them how they sit there they command your silent respect they change day to day surrounded by the changing environment yet they themselves do not often change slowly they work their way out of the earth rising not in a rush to reveal their majesty they calm me i find peace when i'm up in them even though i fear heights i find pride in myself for being brave enough to go higher each time i visit them and i feel lucky because i feel closer to my Maker when i'm around mountains and it may sound absurd but the mountains teach me how I'd like to be a huge, humble refuge an entertainment for some a spiritual conquest for others the Rockies and i have much in common and i can't wait to return

"well it's full speed baby in the wrong direction, baby" those words connected with me in 1996 i felt like a train speeding down a track that i didn't want to be on but i embraced the lessons as they came along sometimes they knocked me the fuck out sometimes they steered me to safer ground "please don't sensor your tears" i know now what that means vulnerability a raw desire to share with the world what you've seen to share what you've learned "what's the matter Mary Jane? tell me" Alanis Morissette sang to me and on many nights i fell asleep to her lyrics those words permeated my brain i felt like she did misunderstood she was begging someone to tell her what was wrong and all these years later i'm ready to confess what i thought i knew was bullshit my arrogant youth my disregard for the feelings of others my insatiable need to be noticed all of it grew from my ego and i fed it for so long that even Al

and your voice i feel it in my bones i want to drink the damn place dry to feel what you're feeling just move in close to me it sure feels good and the world crumbles away like burnt paper carried in the wind when your hand is in mine it's true some things were simply meant to be and your art is what you were meant to do and it's what pulls me close sure feels good time is our to burn baby it's our to burn and i hear your soul and i feel your spirit a master an artist your song is my symphony and i breathe you in like the air i need my lungs full of you

watching you hone your craft and it makes me fall more in love with you you don't have to make another move there's nothing left to prove as your voice rings out in the night it falls upon my ears like prayers soft and healing i can feel the sincerity as your voice echoes dances in the air notes hanging like smoke they linger they alter the atmosphere i'm in love with a musician the music seductive i feel back in the world again and you've made it all so easy like a Greek island you burst green from the deep blue sea light as a Sunday your fingers graze the keys of the piano and i know later you'll play me i'll be your instrument you're my muse i'm yours it's the only way to be blond hair and blue eyes hypnotize me mesmerize me i watch your face as your song comes out and it's all so organic this love fills my heart with a song i'm back in the world in the world again

this is in no way a rant. it's just a testament that time changes people. i used to be so amused to be in a bar beneath the lights and the disco ball full of designer drugs. covered in designer clothes. i thought that it was what i was supposed to do. as a gay man. i was supposed to be fabulous. have a tan. blond hair. be skinny. no one taught me to nurture the inside. all emphasis was on the outside. and now i know it's not in the presentation at all. it's the intention that counts. what i hold dear now is my core. my center. my quiet time. peace. revelations. no longer a slave to that rat race. not going to try to look 25 when i'm really 41. not going to inject my face with fillers and toxins just so YOU think i look good. i apologize in advance for not being able to cheat time. but i'm busy over here with other work. i've been called to care for the sick. i've been called to be a student of the spirit. see, i look at the sky. the ocean. the mountains. and

i have a tale to tell been through hell a man can tell a thousand lies and sometimes that man was me you see i recently started to analyze my purpose find my true voice my ego melting slowly away at a glacier's pace time is a whore she fucks us all i'm no longer the 25 year old fresh faced boy i still see in my mind i know where beauty lives i know the light she gives the life that you could never see i'm freeing me from me the light it shines inside you can't take that from me left sometimes in the dark but my spark never died might've cried if i ran away i'd never have the strength to go very far how would they hear the beating of my heart the part that is buried inside no need to hide i'll let it out will it grow cold, the secret that i hide i will grow old this life is a ride and half of mine has passed hope i last long enough to tell my tale i know so well it's hell that attracts more attention than heaven

no struggle equals no strength almost cracked beneath the pressure no air no care it lifted gifted with a sense of peace some relief my feet planted on the earth birth of a new man with a hand in how he reacts no attacks like the wings of a butterfly flutter no stutter my peace is my goal i'm whole no hole my heart open and healed over a grower slower than most can't boast but i'm happy even if you call me fat i'm alright with that i spent enough time on the outside not where i reside anymore not a whore to the treadmill still i'll get it back on track this life is rollercoaster ride nothing to hide the ups the downs thrown all around these days i'd rather heal with my words than slay the day of that is done set that sun kept the light bright shine on

Been here since the beginning Sinning Winning Forgiving Forgetting Sometimes regretting How I treated you Undo Redo New Way of thought Brand new start You'll miss me when I'm gone Done me wrong Hurt my feelings Our dealings Cutting my joy short Gotta start Letting my emotions show Grow I'm a man by age Rage Not getting me results Insults Don't pay a damn thing So I'll sing From the heart Don't forgive me, I didn't ask Kiss my ass You don't support my path My wrath Silent Like rain My pain Waters my soul Whole Grown Thrown In a new direction Your affection Stole my emotions Right from under me Free Walls crumbling down All around me Free space to roam Coming home I see your face Space My place This is what I want Need Greed Had me held under Hear my thunder I don't feel bad Because I feel good Should Have flown long ago Let me show You that I'm still so good Hood Real It's a deal

Sought refuge Silence Peace Serenity Let my past fall like leaves from a tree Shed who I was Rebirth I deal with things in a different way now Things roll off my back I'm not attached to opinions Like assholes they can be ugly and everyone has one Won't let what you think dictate my movements No puppet Won't hold me down I've found my place in the sun Solid My core is unshakable And those things in the past didn't kill me So I'm  proverbially stronger No longer play the victim I write my destiny And faith leads me to learn and grow Leave behind what doesn't build me up Something will eventually take me out But it won't be you You don't have the power I can meditate shit away Let it float away Like clouds No longer raining on my parade

your words spread like fire through my soul through my veins you sought to wound me fatal like each syllable nailed me to a cross of your own building but my sins aren't yours to forgive not yours to recognize not yours to punish you tried to hold me under now hear my thunder as i roar back into action reaction and i won't say a word i'll walk on the peace i've found means more to me than getting even i wish you well the best in fact i hope that someday when you close your eyes you hear silence instead of those many voices that torment you and send you seeking blood as you sail into my past i smile i survived i broke the chains on me after all the blood i lost with you i'm born a new a new man my future lies in my hands and what i put out i receive so as i close my eyes i wish for you angels peace a reprieve from what you've been trapped in a bird may sing in its cage but once free its echo carries out through the universe

it's yours know it own it you uncovered something in me that lay dormant for eons fossils of what i used to be an imprint who i was before negativity and hurt changed me but you found the frozen image of me and you breathed new life into me so i am an open book when i look into your eyes i see beyond them i see into your soul and your hand falls into mine like home and your words fall on me like rain until i'm soaked sexy and smart own it i'm glad you're as into it as i am let's own it

well i tried and i tried even loved you through the darkness when you obsessed over the addict and my how you've fallen fallen so far and so fast like an anchor is tied to you i think the anchor is still him and it will never be ok never be ok the way he treats you never sit well with his disregard of you so nightly you plunge into a sea of alcohol desperately trying to drown him out you drown you're drowning full to the gills with wine it's getting harder to breathe harder to wake up harder to remember the things you say to the ones who love  you act a lot like him in your careless disregard you're taking it all too far you've taken it all too far my arms are tired from holding you up my mind only wants to remember how it used to be but it is not that anymore and the muck you accept is nowhere i can live so i am giving up on you it's time to save myself not sure who's sicker for holding on to something that's so long gon

like a geologist you excavate me trying to find pieces of me pieces worth keeping and for that i'm grateful these pieces of the Rocky Mountains sit on my bedside table like treasures tiny particles of the enormity of what those mountains are and i feel the power in those rocks the power of the Creator i feel the energy they emit there's magic in the mountains i know God resides there in the quiet the beauty the strength so go on and gather those parts of me that shine for you i can relate i smile as my hand grazes the rocks at my side because i know i've been there i know what i've felt there their language speaks to me to be one with the mountain you must relinquish your control let go of who you are perceptions fall away and finally when you close your eyes you feel them you feel the way they vibrate you see the patterns you see the color differences the texture like God's breath left their shapes out of the crevices they rose and

the ice is thinning out my feet searching for safe ground i can barely breathe when your arms let go of me my whole world has changed floating i watch as you sail away but i have faith that you'll return i'm there in the water to find you and it washes over me baptized i swim through the fluid of my dreams where you touch me endlessly i could drown in your smile like the moon to the earth i satellite you your magnetic field causing waves in my heart can't you see? while i was working to change myself i let you in and you changed me

Like the mountainside before me I've survived a blaze a furious fire you can see my scars where change was forced on me But they only encounter my surface Underneath I've been made formidable by my faith and I know that stars shine above me and the sun sets beneath me quiet still calmly i greet each day from season to season i may appear different because you only see what's on the outside but place your hand on me and you'll feel my solidity cobalt blue framing me storms may hide me for a moment but i'm not movable my faith solid the old man and the mountain one

108 beads prayer meditation mantras seated still quiet reflective peace peace within the present peace with my past like the smoke of the incense it burns away leaving a calm a hypnotic smell of peace buddham saranam gacchami i've felt it change the temperature of the air collectively sat in stillness a witness to the power of prayer vibrations of energy love in the air love for the present a gratefulness for the past respectfully i bow my head sometimes 10 minutes evaporate sometimes an hour but my intent is set on peace peace om shanti shanti shanti and i feel changed my third eye open

You love me Heavily and deeply But tear yourself apart As if mine is an unhealthy love and you're binge eating on my heart Our worlds collide Our egos crash But our love is strong As if to say through space and time you'll be with me whether right or wrong Oh this love It's a song And its melody sweet But I long for a deeper love not one stuck on repeat So i center my soul let the peace take hold I'll hold my breath and dive into the deep, dark unknown At first crying from the loss of you like a death for my heart But quickly realizing we were always better apart So i breathe and i chant and i find my strength again To stand on my legs a new life to begin The peace sets in I've given up the antics of old no longer amused by dramatic displays I wish you peace and fulfillment As we go separate ways To have and not to hold so hot yet so cold You lose in the end what you've struggled to keep don't weep Our love

Buddham Saranam Gacchami....reciting these words changes my whole energy. There is a beauty about the ritual of prayer. The things that we do in preparation. The removing yourself from yourself. Clearing your mind. Cleaning your energy. Giving pure light and energy to the Creator. Meditation and offerings. Small donations brought from you to offer the Divine. There is beauty and power in the process. In recognizing your unique journey closer to the center of all being. Sitting in quiet. Sitting with peace. Using beads and statues to focus on what you aspire to become more like. Better. Kinder. Compassionate. Patient. Calm. Quiet.  Connecting by spirit with the people surrounding you. All here for the same reason. To come closer. To go beyond. With hands folded and thumbs interlocked. The energy takes over. It can change the temperature of the air. It's electric. Many feelings bring about a flood of goodness in us, but none greater than peace. Absolute quiet. And when the vibrations

Breathe in breathe out aware conscious my mind settles my third eye no longer blind seeing the world in a new way feeling at home in this calm serenity quiet nothing stirs my brain on pause my focus is divinity not so much a feeling, but knowledge a higher being i feel lifted from the ground searched years for this feeling i wasnt' accepted until i accepted i don't have to be anything i'm not i don't have to change who i am i am a rebel a buddha one i feel filled with Light forget it never to sing forever i sing for us for peace for better for love i sing for joy i sing because i am able and in this simple moment i am reborn

I pray to God Spirited love awakens us may her soul wash over me cleanse hate erase all pain dirty hands gone light from eyes purify my blood feet stand strong i pray to God wash over me wash over us be with us all forever today

not easy to solve many perspectives solid on quicksand waiting on answers drawn to conclusions it storms in the desert mirages in a rain forest prevailing is an option failing is never a solution it's life as we know it we don't know it that well with effort all can be known

I gave too much giving fumes and such that's my fault wanted to block an assault i went to battle wounded with a rattle i led the way hoping my friends would stay some understand i had to march with the band I've made this epic Now in need of  an antiseptic i fell for love that was hate so i could open this gate you see me struggle for us i can destroy this puss instead of a bandage i go for the root and wage a war on my infection of fear i hope you will stay near if you know me my strength you'll see

i used to think if i could melt your heart we'd never be apart but like fire desire your Messiah i appear near to hold you in the depths steps in the right direction to remove you from my side reside in peace relief i sat in meditation broke your spell under which i fell your words lured me in like a fish in the net no regret i tasted your flesh i fell hell was easier than you had to undo what we did hid beneath a guise despised who i was until i found my center no repenter i accept what i've been through you moved me like a mountain a fountain of tears i shed led me into the footsteps of peace i bow how i've come so far so fast i hope this lasts this feeling of meaning upon my knees i kneel heal my soul made whole

i am the earth under your feet can't repeat can't tread where we've been can't unsee the seen you were the gasoline i was the match to catch aflame my heart still burning yearning for your touch such fire higher than i'd ever flown before like a whore on the floor begging you to wrap your arms around me see what i can be what i can give live with my flaws your claws leave their mark spark in the dark a bed of flames shames buried in the dirt your shirt removed slowly unholy my actions your reactions sticky hot mess undress flesh against flesh no rest we consumed each other with a desire hotter than fire but those pages burn it's my turn to use my passion to turn my gas on high to fly above this desire of the flesh not like the rest i can take the vow how i remember your taste a waste my time crime shamed engulfed in flame fire higher but i rise your cries from eyes that fake tears years from now ho

tears fall to the beat bowed at your feet your green face smiles beguiles me free above the ground no sound just silence through my mind kind thoughts words deeds no greed just simply bowed in your awe things changing deep within if i could wrap my arms around you i would i could hang on to this feeling forever

two of us filled with desire a fire dangerous you were everything i'd need fire met gasoline never meant to be so mean but you consumed me i could barely breathe fire and gasoline struck the match we catched fire higher flames engulfed us combust i'm willing tonight to risk it all when the fire dies darkened skies the smoke remains in my throat about to choke my love for you is killing me thrilling me torture and pleasure trash and treasure strike the match and burn with me tonight

i hope that you are resting quietly and that you've found the peace you never could in life in stillness i've found my voice i've found a way to let go of you found my flame finding a way to quiet my ego and know realness i'm changing learning growing so i am putting you in my past i can't have you in "today" i've made my peace with that so i will try to keep your legacy alive by being the best man i can be i'll honor you with my being i used to be so angry when people suggested i should learn to let you go and now i have learned and in the absence of anger grew my peace

today i listened not just heard i listened as the birds sang around me i listened to the bamboo rustling in the breeze i felt the energy of the earth the force that makes the sun rise each day the pull that keeps the planets aligned that core energy in each of us it's what makes us special i closed my eyes i didn't need to rely on my sight i listened for everything i needed today i could feel the vibration of the energy around me i felt one with the flow in solitude i recited 108 prayers i offered peaceful energy into the world around me and i heard as it flowed out i knelt in reverence as my voice recited the prayers i listened to the vibration my words created i listened as i put peace into motion peace for you peace for myself i prayed very hard for peace today i prayed to be a better version of myself and i was thankful for the path that the past year has taken me down

sitting in reverence your green marble figure reminding me of my divinity that i should try to be more like you conscious patient forgiving that Nirvana awaits that my ego is but a fragment of who i am i am at peace bowed in offering to you a small symbol of what i get back i pray silent silence peace i am humbled by your nature i am intrigued by your peace i seek to know more to do more to be better beneath this temple i feel reborn awake my eyes are open not only to what i should change but to what i have forgotten to celebrate

i roamed the barren desert of your heart a treacherous landscape void of life trying to win your love i had to split my psyche in 3 one of me stood there, frozen just waiting, listening for a heartbeat something to beckon me the second of me investigated searching for a source of life a potential for love my fingernails split from digging through the dry, rough surface of your heart foreign  my third counterpart had to charm you lure you into the rain to feel the rhythm of your heart as it splashed in the wetness in solitude i learned a great deal about myself and my past and my strength i faced my weaknesses conquered the demons in my own head that would not accept love and i poured myself out to you i encountered walls obstacles i prayed not to be prey the tundra of your being almost leaving me permafrost but my love was a source of light and slowly but surely it thawed out enough of your terrain that you opened up like a flower

We are taught to go out into the world and work. Succeed. Make money. Buy things. Houses. Cars. Clothes. We are bombarded with reality TV and faux celebrities flashing $1000 bottles of champagne and $1,000,000 cars. Living in $50,000,000 homes and taking private jets to faraway places. What we are not reminded of on a daily basis is that what REALLY matters is how you treat others. What you put out into the world around you. Because eventually those cars break down, those houses begin to fall apart, the clothes go out of style. BUT the one thing that doesn't ever fade away is love. And if you want to be part of making the world a better place, the easiest way to do so is to be kind to the person standing next to you. Just a smile and a courteous "hello" can set change into motion. Quit thinking big. Think small. Think about what you can do to help someone. Do you know someone in need of money? Give them $10. That small contribution (which is equivalent to a visit to Starb

you took forever off the table without even discussing it with me i no longer answer my phone when you call i think it's only fair driving fast late at night the highway before me symbolizing a new path my sunroof open the night sky blanketing above me stars like tiny holes to heaven twinkle on the wind in my hair the feeling of freedom the night pregnant with opportunity i always knew i never wanted this all the broken promises i'll never miss on this night i feel reborn like a new man on a mission live fast run free love is a game too complicated for me the brevity of life hangs in my mind i've wasted too much time on romantic love i'll drive on in the night alone

you're my ocean sometimes i float on your smooth as glass surface other times i'm fighting for my life beneath your turbulence yet i love you all of you the beautiful days the stormy nights i love the way the sun bathes you in its golden glory and i'm not sure who is lovelier (it's hard to outshine the sun, but you do sometimes) you give me life nourish a part of me that was nearly dead i swim through your seas you bring me to my knees you contain little treasures that i'm always happy to find you're vast and full of secrets you're my ocean my sea ain't no place i'd rather be than right beneath your surface drifting dreaming sailing bobbing you take me where i need to be your silent power amazes me when i'm at my driest i'm still wet each day a new discovery

I found this woman who is perfect for me, She loves me even when she ain't lonely. There was a time when women only loved me when they were horny and lonely. Them girls were just honely. This new girl she sure is sweet, I finally have one worth sweeping off her feet. Them ol girls from the past can kiss my ass. It sure is nice to finally meet a woman with some class. My friends used to see me in the bar, they would say harv that girl don't love you man she is just horny and lonely. That bitch is honely. Now they see me out and about, And everyone knows what me and my new girl are all about. She don't just love me when she is horny and lonely. She loves me all the time not just when she is honely.

life in Louisiana for me means gorgeous scenery mighty oaks covered in moss alligators turtles, fish, snakes boundless seafood the Gulf of Mexico in our backyard life in Louisiana is slower humid sticky it's about summer evenings on the porch with your favorite drink telling tall tales laughter celebration our history runs deep our love does too Louisiana is a melting pot it's dark past is slowly emerging as a promising future people will look you in the face here and say, "mais hello cher" they smile la joie de la vie there is joy here from dusty festivals filled with music and food to lazy plantations that stand as testaments to our past from winding bayous to mysterious swamps lined with cypress trees we live in a rich, beautiful state we burst with culture and life i look out at the state around me and i'm filled with pride to live here Louisiana is my love i'll take crawfish boils and beer over traffic jams and smog any day

there are people who will attack you brush them off cast them away there are people who live for drama who desire to take you down their motive is usually jealousy so, let them smoke, drink and slander raise your head high walk tall be strong for the ones who give you a hard time are the ones who build your character let them carry on at some point people will see them like they've bathed in Windex to the crazy one who goes on and on and on spewing your words of hate to everyone you think will listen i thank you you can't truly hate someone unless you love them and if you didn't give a damn, you'd really just shut up so thank you for the love you show even if your expression is twisted i forgive you it's the only way you know to be dysfunctional and you've removed weeds from my garden my life is happier and sunnier without you

be kind i'm not the marrying kind love me from afar no jar shall capture me like a lightning bug hug me don't trap me in when i'm ready i'll reveal what's concealed the deal not sealed until i say my day not governed by your desire to couple i chuckle at that old hat to think that you need someone to be fulfilled deal with the fact jack that if i think i can do better alone i'll roam until i find a mate worth giving forgiving of my flaws and all fall madly in love still might not say "i do" for you no sign you're mine might just have to know it rather than show it a feeling deep within you win my heart never part love me for who i am no sham no farce remorse for trying to fence me in begin to accept that i'm wilder than you thought can't be bought my love i hand over with caution not ever so often

Love Spent yeah i'm love spent wondering where it all went you blew through my money faster than my love but i'm spent it's spent we're spent feeling love spent paid my debt in full you pull at my strings make me do things i'd not normally do you make me want to sacrifice all that i have glad just to have you around but your greed i take heed it devours showers you and me the lust in your eyes is green seen by me we can't work out you're about what you can gain at my expense repents you claim what i've earned shoulda learned to love me for me free from that trap your grasp on my earnings leaves me yearning for love that means more than what's in store for you you gain my pain ignored endured enough of this shit i quit love spent bankrupt corrupt love has left me broke i choke on the words i tried to say my day consumed by your greed indeed i'll survive and thrive without you sucking the

if you can't take the heat get out my kitchen stop bitcin' that i'm hotter than you thought caught up in your old way of thinking sinking beneath the heat that i radiate great that i am not afraid to burn you yearn to be chopped on my block your cock exposed the show of you do what you have to to show grow know that what you show you become homerun my kitchen contains the heat tweet your ass off smoke some grass off get high reply to what i say to you do the glue that binds us lust does not begin to tell the tale hell we've been through it didn't ruin us the love i have for you is deep it seeps in creeps in my psyche reshaped me raped me my soul remains whole you built me up not corrupt our love above all loves i hold dear you're near my heart no part art like a painting you stroke me provoke me to create my muse my fuse you take me higher inspire something deep within my soul longs to be whole

too eager you beaver you pussy ass mother fuckers wanna drink it up from my cup thirsty like Kirstie Alley shall we get fat you 'bout that? for what you suck down you clown won't give you wings or wedding rings you thirsty bitch take a sip from my pimp ass cup drink up thinking you could be me puh leeze your sleeze will never wear my crown bow down you thirsty bitch take a sip get a grip build your own life won't wife me free from all that shit not one bit will i give in dirty not thirsty i've done what i've wanted taunted you i do what i feel get real my cup runneth over red rover range rovers you thirsty bitches take a sip dip yourself in my magic you're tragic revealed healed or concealed it's up to you what you do chasing my shadow trying to claim my throne alone i stand my hand in the air no care for pretenders no surrenders for me as i pour it over your head you're baptized my secrets

Lights down low Swag turns glow Pump a 70s beat Grooves to our feet Strobe light Tongue fight Pump the beat Get your feet My hips gyrate Got boyfriends irate Robotic Flobotic Baby-maker Soul-shaker Mr. Roboto, So Floboto My swag turns glow Those lights down low Get your feet Pump the beat

you want me to feel sorry you wish i were meek when you throw you words in my face i turn the other cheek not weak brave i crave to rise above i'll rest on my cloud secure my crown my tombstone will read Unapologetic Bitch i'm not sorry for not being sorry for offending you not defending you your thoughts never influenced my actions i think for myself i'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me not attached to your judgment no concern for your opinion i live my life out loud in full color for me unapologetic for what i've done to get me here i'm an unapologetic bitch i seek no redemption from the world around me don't feel sorry for me i brought i all upon myself a dazzling show a spectacle and i was entertaining because i didn't give a fuck what you thought still don't wouldn't feel sorry then still not sorry now Unapologetic Bitch i won't bow down can't tear me down won't break me down i'l

When you laid me down Touched me, no frown What boy wouldn’t get wet Yet Your touches Were rushes Waves gone deep into my blood My heart Yours My body Yours truly Love me like you do Just us two Say those sweet words Like gentle birds Driving me towards ecstasy More wet I crave you If you leave my bed I will always love you

I was spitting words like Madonna Hanging out with some brothas Trying to figure out where we were we were stuck between Papa Don't Preach and Like a Prayer but then this boy walked by so sexy, confident like a lioness, hiding her inner lion he wanted more than groins a lion with an inner lioness, me i just had to Express Myself Who's that Boy? Erotica took hold My center is the Borderline like that i was on top passion between us like that i was on bottom his center glued to my back the energy was one, chemistry so sudden, so right Frozen, we weren't pop Music Look deeper, we are more he shot inside me his Ray of Light He held me, i wept I was no longer Like a Virgin Nothing like a Material Girl

the adoration that i sought was yours but i was unaware i still thought that the whole world needed to love what i offered i didn't yet to know to be so specific and i did anything in my power to be noticed changed who i was changed what i looked like to satisfy the ever-changing taste of the world around me from Miami to New York i danced sometimes to my own beat sometimes the beat of someone else i swam in the oceans in Miami i dredged through the concrete of New York City looking for what i was meant to be a party boy a chameleon even while pretending to be superficial i knew that what i felt was different i remember the first time i saw you incredible and all was beautiful simple you appreciated me for who i was beneath the guise so i trade being loved by everyone to being loved my you it's easy no thinking about it my soul wants it i love you you love me we have overcome so many obstacles i love you it's simple pure true what can i

i learned something about love with you. i learned that it doesn't hold onto our youth like our egos do. i learned that it isn't perfect like we'd like it be. i learned that it takes work even if it seems easy. i learned that i'm not always the masterpiece behind the ropes. that sometimes i'm the gawker staring at the beauty before me. that sometimes i won't be able to express how overwhelmed i feel by the beauty i see in you. that sometimes my darkness won't seem capable of your light. that sometimes it will feel like i'm stealing your love. that i will at times feel less than. that i will question my belief system. that i will change how i react to things. i will succumb. i will face my own vulnerability. that i will be ok with admitting that i need something greater than myself. that i will seek something more important than my own reflection. that i will be guided toward your love....even if i feel unworthy

no longer so young nor so golden i can recognize my flaws now i can make peace with my deterioration the outside maybe fading but the inside is growing more beautiful closer to the truth i've heard the words the criticism that i'm fat  that i'm old that i'm almost bald that i've done it all and with a smile on my face i think "you ain't seen nothing yet" you have no idea what lies ahead for i'm shedding my attachment to the exterior and i'm working on the interior developing my own belief system and i believe in me something in me will carry on you can't stop that

do i inspire you? could i sinspire you? could i light that fire in you? could you burn up from my love? could you fuck me in the street and not care? could you dare? the way you bite my lip the way you grip my hair and pull on me from behind rewind to a time when it was more innocent like an infant sucking on my thumb playing dumb trying not to give into your advances dying to take chances this game of love we play the 3 words i've been dying to say between my thighs not like other guys that didn't mean a thing i'd wear a ring i'd say "i do" to be with you i'm not chicken-al to be traditional that's the most shocking fact how you react will write our story guts and glory i reach for my glass and notice your ass divine mine like sips of wine on my lips strips me of any care i dare to share i give my hand to you made anew this smile that i wear i swear it's all about you and what you do

attraction reaction so much satisfaction a physical attraction a chemical reaction visceral satisfaction from the moment i saw your face i knew it's never gone away i have carried my love for you like an egg careful not to shatter it they say when an egg is broken from the outside, any chance of life dies but when it breaks from the inside, life begins so i'm leaving it up to you for once i relinquish my desire for control i know you love me too you've proven that time and time again there is magic between us something unspoken rare beautiful i don't particularly believe in marriage for myself but i'd marry you right now in this room if you'd have it love seeps from my pores i love you so you change the way i think i like that thinking only of myself for so long has made me grown tired of myself i'm ready to try something new

my mind is full of "perhaps" tonight perhaps if i'd made more time for you perhaps if i'd relinquish some of the time i spend with my friends and family perhaps perhaps we could've made something of our connection but i'd have had to give up too much of myself for someone i don't feel even knows how to meet halfway so perhaps the best has happened perhaps i'm better without if someone can't love you for who you are, it's time to exit if someone faults you for having friends and family as your top priority perhaps his priorities are not in order perhaps i'm getting out of it the easiest way possible perhaps perhaps i will retain who i am at least i know that i'm still willing now i know that a few good ones are still out there perhaps when i'm not paying any attention to it someone will come along perhaps perhaps perhaps all i know for sure on this night is that my faith remains unshaken and perhaps that was th

i walk on the ground that you rest beneath and time has stripped you of your flesh just a bunch of dust now and if i could reach my arms through the earth to hold you i would a void a six foot deep hole swallowed you resting in peace i hope long ago i try to imagine what you'd be today what we'd be in my mind you would have accepted me for all my flaws supported me even when i was failing in my heart you have your legacy lives on and as morbid and haunting as it feels at times i'm glad not everyone has an angel watching over them but on this day my heart is sinking it's so hard to accept that you're six feet beneath me so close yet so far there's a scar in my soul that each day i try to hide and on most days i succeed but today it overwhelms

our love like a flock of birds scattered fly on and you weigh heavy on my heart hovering above and i look to the heavens and think of you just like a flock of birds in every direction we flew and this pain that i feel is sweet sadness for i loved you so my hand fit into yours i think of you i don't forget you're always in my head like prayers i offer my words to the wind and hope they are carried to you i never really got the chance to know you you were the great mystery the other half of me and still i love you just for being for if you never existed i wouldn't put pen to paper i'm half of you and i hope that half makes you proud i may not look like you but perhaps i feel like you did maybe you had a poetic soul and on this night that though feels like a hug and it's enough

on a starry night beneath the light of the moon basking in the twinkling of the stars above me feels like something is broken inside me something is lost whenever you go all i know is that i love you so so much that it hurts got a tattoo on my arm a constellation of my own all i know is that i am lost in your fire below on a starry night it's clear to me that your mark on me is permanent between sips of wine i smile my soul fed my head calm all of my life i've searched for the way that i feel right now on this starry night

days like this long and summery the sun kissing the earth lighting the way i stroll around looking at the flowers and this minute is precious almost perfect i watch the fruition of the seeds that you planted and all my life i've had to learn the art of letting go it never gets easier but my tears celebrate what you were to me the legacy you leave letting go isn't easy it's exceedingly hurtful but you're always in my head forever in my heart so i look up with hope and i feel you up above i can feel your arms around me i can sense your love

i have an angel he wears no wings he wears a heart that melts my own he has a touch that feels like home you've got to be careful with good love you changed my whole world with one smile we share the same soul the same world big and small grand and minute it's the joy that i feel when you're around it's like the best drunk ever it's like our life is in sepia tone softer gentler i get it now "love should be easy" looking at those stars together better i am better than i was a year ago and better than i was the year before that time marches on all the dreams have made their way into my day to day scene

there were noises in my head voices telling me just to stand still breathe the moment in feel the air fill my lungs and just be happy with what i have and who i am simplicity the sunlight bathing me in peace and at that moment my soul grew wings and stretched them out to prove their strength ready to soar the only thing i know right now is that i should......i should....

looking up at the constellations starry eyed surprise a night blooming with stars pinpoints of light in a black velvet night and sometimes getting lost is not a waste of time especially when it's with you and a bottle of wine listening to you tell your stories you caress my arm and trace my own constellation this love this moment it's simple and pure stars above us chasing the day away all else fades fades away night eventually giving way to day and we are on this blanket together and it's perfect it's nice in life that sometimes when you can't get what you've wanted fate hands you what you've needed

Chasing the Fairy’s Ass So many people lost happiness. Happiness is such a nebulous concept. It is different for each individual. Finding it can be difficult, especially because we often think one thing will make us happy and then we find that it doesn't. We often don't recognize happiness. Think about this...think of your first apartment. For most of us, it was a small apartment in a questionable neighborhood with used or cheap ass furniture and a fridge filled with condiments from fast food places and 7-Elevens and a cupboard filled with Ramen noodles. Band and movie posters on the walls, small TV (possibly with rabbit ears), crappy stereo with antenna at full crank. One bowl, one plate, one glass. Maybe two or three if you had room mates. One or two sets of sheets and towels. A vacuum...umm...do we need that? Yeah? Well, okay...You probably spent many a night in that crappy apartment, music on, kicking back drinks with friends, trying to drown out the noise from the wh